When Demigods Use DNA Testing Kits(A Percy Jackson Fanfic)
by Orca2Whale
Summary: When Nico decides to use a genetic testing kit to find out if he has any relatives, he forgets a few minor details that make him regret his "almost-accurate-and-less-work-required (supposedly)" idea...
1. When Demigods Use DNA Testing Kits

**Disclaimer: I don't own Rick's stuff. That's weird.**

**I saw something on Reddit and...yeah. I was looking something else up but this was a really interesting idea so...here's my take on it. **

"Are you sure this is gonna work? I mean, gods don't have DNA..." Percy squinted at the genetic testing kit in his hands.

Nico rolled his eyes skywards. "You got a better plan for finding out if I have any mortal relatives without contacting them or digging for hours through files that aren't in Greek or Latin or using technology?"

"He has a point..." Reyna pointed out.

Annabeth nodded. "True. Let's just hope no mortal viewing this thing can see through the Mist though, that'd get...interesting."

"Let's just do this before Nico chickens out." Percy opened up the kit.

"Solace, I swear to the gods-" Nico started. Will smirked and swabbed his cheeck while he was halfway talking. "HEY!" Nico yelped. Will closed up the envelope and pointedly ignored his boyfriend.

Annabeth took the envelope and ran it down to the mailbox.

"And now, we wait." Percy said when Annabeth came back.

**(Linebreak)**

It was two weeks later when the results came back.

Will, Percy, Jason, Annabeth, and Hazel were with Nico in the Poseidon cabin (Will had pointed out that if anything had happened, they needed to contact some Mist-manipulators and Chiron ASAP).

Annabeth's laptop, the one Deadulus had given her (they'd done a little convinng and bargainig to get it back from Tarturus) was in front of them.

"Let's do this." Nico sighed. Annabeth clicked a few times and the results popped up.

"Hmm, it says here that you're 48% Italian, 2% other nationalaties, and have the "perfect" Greek DNA.-oh good, at least the mortal that did this was blinded by the Mist." Annabeth was relieved by this.

Will leaned over Annabeth's shoulder. "Huh, It also says that you have-oh gods."

Nico pushed Percy aside. "What it is-holy Zeus..." he groaned.

The screen showed that there were 200+ people that could be related to him. Including a whole host of di Angelos.

"Well, I mean...um...Baby boomer era? People had a lot of kids back then..." Annabeth tried.

Percy and Jason took one look and were rolling on the floor laughing.

Nico threw up his hands. "Great. Now I'll probably have relatives waltzing over here thinking "oh hey, it's a relative we've never met, but let's go say hi!""

Just then, one of the Stolls was heard yelling, "Hey guys, there's a giant limo outside and they're asking for one Nico di Angelo!"

Nico turned pale. "Hide mee!" he yelped, trying to crawl under Percy's bed.

Hazel pulled him out. "You're meeting your family, brother dearest. Now come on." she said firmly. The other demigods half-dragged, half-pulled, half-carried Nico outside, where most of the camp was gathering to see the comotion.

Up on the road, there was indeed a limo with several Italians standing outside. Chiron, in wheelchair form, was speaking to them, looking half-amused, half-tense. When he caught sight of the protesting Nico, he motioned to him to come over.

Jason, Percy, Will, and Hazel dragged Nico over to Chiron and the oldest-looking man. "Here's one Nico di Angelo. Any last words, Nico?" Percy grinned.

"Shut up, Percy. I could still kil you right now." Nico grumbled.

"You're the one who insisted on the DNA test, brother." Hazel sighed, before turning to the man. "Hello, I'm Hazel, Nico's sister. Sorry if Nico's being rude, he usually is when he wakes up before noon."

"I can affirm, as his b-"Will started to say, before Nico slugged him in the arm. "Ow," he complained. "What'd I do?"

Chiron sighed. "Nico, this is Augusto di Angelo. His father was Maria's brother, which makes you his...nephew, I believe." The look he was giving him clearly said, _Just play along, because you're too young to be Maria's son. "_Augusto, this is Nico. the late Bianca di Angelo's son."

Nico most certainly understood the reasoning. After all, he'd been stuck in a casino for a few too many years. He couldn't really tell people that. "Uh...nice to meet you?"

"The pleasure is mine. This is my family, my wife Rosa and our children, Carla, Elena, and Sergio." The kids, who were about Nico's age, waved, while Augusto's wife beamed.

"You said you were his sister?" Elena eyeballed Hazel, who nodded. "Huh. You two do not look remotely alike."

"Elena, don't be rude." Rosa scolded.

"It's fine. We get that a lot. I'm from Nico's dad's side." Hazel explained. "Different mom, though."

"And I'm his boyfriend." Will cut in, leaning on Nico.

Nico shoved Will off. "You're an annoying doctor who can't seem to realize that my cabin does not need more light then it already has."

"Guys, break it up. You can argue later. " Percy quickly interrupted. "So, Nico, you want to go with them for now or something?"

Chiron shook his head at the Son of Poseidon. "Percy, mind you manners. You haven't introduced yourself at all. Neither have the rest of you, besides Hazel and Will."

Jason grimaced. "Oh yeah, sorry 'bout that. I'm Jason Grace, s-cousin on Nico's dad's side. Same with Percy but we're not brothers."

"We're bros." Percy nodded. Hazel rolled her eyes behind him.

"Oh my, more unheard-of relatives? This is really something!" Augusto boomed. "I never dreamed that Maria's family line would manage to extend the way it did, seeing as after the death of she and her son my father mentioned he never heard anything else about them."

Nico chuckled nervously. "Yeah, uh, my mother sort of kept a low profile."

"Understatement." Jason mutterd.

"Huh? What do you mean by 'understatement'?" Carla asked.

Nico flushed red, but luckily was spared from answering when Annabeth came running up Half-Blood Hill. "Stolls...prank...cabin 20.." she gasped.

Will groaned. "Holy Hera...Well, it was nice meeting you, but it appears we now have to go mop up the mess that certain people have created...again...I swear to the gods I'm never going to sleep a full night this summer..." Will sighed, heading off down the hill and back through the borders.

"Uh, yeah, nice meeting you." Nico was dimly aware that Jason and Percy had also run off, possibly to help Annabeth.

Rosa smiled at him. "Do you have a cellphone number or email so we can keep in touch? We'd love to have you at our annual family reunion!"

Nico internally groaned. "No." was his blatant answer. His-wait, neices and nephew? Yeah, that was technically correct-looked horrified.

But Annabeth had already planned ahead for this. "You can call one of these numbers." she smiled, handing Augusto a peice of paper. "The first one is the phone number for this place, the second one is my boyfriend's apartment in Manhatten, that's where Nico sometimes stays during the school year, the third is for Hazel's camp in California, which Nico also sometimes goes to, and the final one is his dad's number, which you shouldn't call unless you're absolutely desperate. Just ask for Nico di Angelo, and if anyone asks who gave you the numbers, tell them it was Annabetth Chase."

Nico gave her a death glare. Annabeth smirked at him, while Hazel gave him a warning look to be nice.

A series of yells could be heard and Annabeth sighed. "And now, if you'll excuse us, we head counselors need to go stop the other head counselors from turning Cabin 11's latest prank into World War 5. Thanks for coming, bye!" Annabeth walked off and Nico and Hazel followed, with Nico giving a small wave at his extended family.

The moment they were out of earshot, Nico spun on Annabeth. "You planned this."

"Nope."

"Yes."

"Only part of it. Now go and hep your doctor boyfriend before I go back and give them your birthday so they can celebrate."

Nico groaned and moaned, "And this is why demigods don't use genetic testing kits. Especially if they'r efrom another centruy." as he walked off.

**Hmm, didn't plan on it going that way but ok, sure. Uh, Reviews and enjoy! I might make a better version with the other outcome or something :)**


	2. The Other Ending

**Disclaimer: I don't own Rick's stuff. That's weird.**

**The second ending...**

"Are you sure this is gonna work? I mean, gods don't have DNA..." Percy squinted at the genetic testing kit in his hands.

Nico rolled his eyes skywards. "You got a better plan for finding out if I have any mortal relatives without contacting them or digging for hours through files that aren't in Greek or Latin or using technology?"

"He has a point..." Reyna pointed out.

Annabeth nodded. "True. Let's just hope no mortal viewing this thing can see through the Mist though, that'd get...interesting."

"Let's just do this before Nico chickens out." Percy opened up the kit.

"Solace, I swear to the gods-" Nico started. Will smirked and swabbed his cheeck while he was halfway talking. "HEY!" Nico yelped. Will closed up the envelope and pointedly ignored his boyfriend.

Annabeth took the envelope and ran it down to the mailbox.

"And now, we wait." Percy said when Annabeth came back.

**(Linebreak)**

It was two weeks later when the results came back.

Will, Percy, Jason, Annabeth, and Hazel were with Nico in the Poseidon cabin (Will had pointed out that if anything had happened, they needed to contact some Mist-manipulators and Chiron ASAP).

Annabeth's laptop, the one Deadulus had given her (they'd done a little convinng and bargainig to get it back from Tarturus) was in front of them.

"Let's do this." Nico sighed. Annabeth clicked a few times and the results popped up.

"Hmm, it says here that you're 48% Italian, 2% other nationalaties,and...Oh, it also says they want you to resend your test, you apparantly are missing half your DNA. They think it was tampered with."

Nico groaned. "Yeah...no." Will said. "Once was lucky, twice they'll call the police or something."

"What do you even call for this stuff?" Jason wondered.

"The government, who'll think you're an alien." Percy snickered. Annabeth smack him. "Not helping."

"Ok, so what do we do?" Jason asked. "Look, it still shows Nico may be related to a bunch of people..."

Nico looked terrified at the sheer number. "Uh, I'm just...going to...go now...Bye!" He yelled, disappearing into the sahdows and leaving his friends to deal with any potential family that decided to take a trip to 3.14 Farm Road.


End file.
